Ep. 287 Caregiving in the Sandwich Generation with Amy Friesen

If you’re feeling stretched thin between caring for your kids, supporting your aging parents, and keeping up with work, you’re not alone.

Welcome to the sandwich generation—a growing group of adults juggling both ends of the caregiving spectrum while still trying to manage their own lives.

And let’s be real: it’s a lot.

On this week’s episode of To Your Health, I sat down with senior care expert Amy Friesen to talk about the unique challenges of caregiving in this stage of life, the emotional and mental load it carries, and how to make it more manageable—without completely burning out.

What Makes Caregiving So Hard?

If you’re in the thick of this, you already know: caregiving isn’t just about the logistics. Sure, there are schedules to juggle, appointments to book, and decisions to make—but the real weight often comes from the emotional toll.

Amy and I talked about some of the biggest challenges facing the sandwich generation, including:

✅ The feeling that everything falls on your shoulders
✅ The guilt that comes with setting boundaries—especially when you feel like there’s no one else to step in
✅ The exhaustion of making constant decisions, often without a clear roadmap
✅ The challenge of navigating conversations with aging parents—especially when their expectations don’t align with your reality

The truth is, most of us weren’t taught how to handle this. And with people living longer than ever, more families are facing these tough conversations without a clear plan.

How to Care for Aging Parents Without Burning Out

One of the biggest takeaways from this episode? Boundaries matter.

Amy emphasized that caregiving doesn’t have to mean doing everything yourself. In fact, trying to be the sole provider of care—on top of work, parenting, and life—only leads to burnout. Instead, she suggests:

✔️ Recognizing your limits: You can’t do it all, and that’s okay. It’s important to be honest about what you can realistically take on.
✔️ Asking for help: Whether it’s siblings, extended family, or professional caregivers, it’s okay to involve others in the process.
✔️ Letting go of perfection: No one else will do things exactly the way you would—but that doesn’t mean they’re doing it wrong.
✔️ Navigating guilt, not avoiding it: Guilt is inevitable, no matter what choice you make. The key is learning to move forward with it, instead of letting it dictate your actions.

The Conversation We All Avoid (But Shouldn’t)

One of the most powerful parts of our conversation was about elder care planning—something most people don’t think about until they’re already in a crisis.

Many of us assume we’ll always be independent, or we push off thinking about future care because it feels too overwhelming. But as Amy pointed out, having a plan now makes everything easier later.

She broke down:
✔️ Why most people avoid planning ahead (and why that’s a mistake)
✔️ The most important documents and decisions to have in place before you need them
✔️ A simple way to start the conversation with your loved ones—without feeling overwhelmed

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone

The biggest takeaway? You’re not the only one struggling to balance it all.

Caregiving can feel isolating, but millions of people are facing the same challenges. The more we talk about it, share resources, and set boundaries, the more sustainable this role becomes.

If this resonates with you, I highly recommend giving this episode a listen. Amy shares invaluable insights that can help you navigate this phase of life with more clarity and less stress.